In 2014, when the war started, I was 18 years old. I was a first-year student majoring in cultural studies at Taras Shevchenko University.Everything that happened in the country over that period seemed very distant. I have never been a person who closely observes the political arena, but there comes a moment in life when politics begins to show interest in you instead. And whether you want it or not, it becomes an integral part of our life. I had a clear understanding that we were puppets in a game where world leaders seek to establish their spheres of influence. A young, frail mind, encountering something like this for the first time, could not know for sure how far these "games" are gonna go.
For me, the war began on June 2, 2014. War at the front is one thing, but when it breaks into your everyday life, it can really wake you up from strong illusions. On that day, I met my young man with whom I recently started a romantic relationship and we went for a walk in the center of Luhansk. He said that he really wants to introduce me to his mother because he considers me an important person in his life. At the time his mom was near the regional administration of the city, she needed to resolve some issues regarding her divorce. At that moment, my boyfriend and I were standing by the monument to Voroshylov, close to the regional administration, so that we could meet his mother right away when she was done.
From the very beginning of that day, some residents of the city could notice planes periodically circling up in the air. We were sitting near the monument to Voroshylov and talking about something unrelated, when a plane started flying right above us. It sometimes went down, then went up and, having made a circle, returned. My bf alarmingly announced that we had to go and started calling his mother to express his concerns. There was no signal any longer, on the other end of the phone sounded: "Currently, the receiver cannot accept your call. Please call later." He then looked at me and said that the plane here is not without a reason and has a purpose. He wanted to become a military pilot and studied a little about these things. And then he said that its target was likely the regional administration. And again began to dial his mom. There was no answer as before. The plane continued its flight, and at that moment there came a deafening roar. I thought I was asleep. Everything felt in a very surreal way, such coincidences simply do not happen. That the mother of your loved one could be there. "It's all a terrible dream," I thought, "I need to wake up as soon as possible." I remember how we ran towards the nearest bus stop, which was exactly opposite the regional administration. My partner squeezed my hand and said that his mother was there - in the epicenter of events. He just wanted to know one thing - that she was alive and that everything was fine with her. He put me on a bus and told me to go home. I didn't understand much, I just did what he said, although I didn't want to leave, I had to stay there, which I informed him about. He said, "No, it's not safe here." Then I jumped into the bus and went home. Everyone around was running somewhere, the phone calls did not stop, people's voices sounded like a continuous indecipherable hum, and I had only one thought in my head: "How is his mom?"
When I was finally able to call, my boyfriend said he was going to the hospital, his mother was already there, he managed to see her getting carried into the ambulance. And then he added:
- My aunt was also there, with my mom.
- “Was”?
- Yes, she died on the spot.
That’s when I realized that the war is already here, right under our noses. What seemed so far away knocked brazenly and mercilessly at your door.
My parents decided not to go anywhere. They lived in the city of Alchevsk. A city that did not know the horror of war that other cities saw. Alchevsk was a sort of a "gray zone" because a metallurgical plant  was located on its territory. Of course, I stayed with my family. I will remember that summer forever. The summer that turned many people's lives upside down. The summer after which you can never be the same. The summer of eternal separation from loved ones: many left forever, and I never saw them again. All my acquaintances and friends were scattered around the world. And for some reason I decided to stay and live through all this strange experience, to experience life to the fullest, and not only in the conditions of a beautiful existence, when your only problem is what to wear or what to cook for dinner.
I kept studying in Luhansk. All these years, I watched how my reality was changed, how facts were distorted, how a new reality was formed that had no relation to the real state of things. I refused to accept this reality, but I was never able to leave. Here is my house and my family, I could not abandon everything that is dear to me in the most difficult time for them.